im too fat.

im 50 again.
im so fat.
i'm not going to blog for a while.
i need to be back on track.
i'm just going to allow myself 500 a day.
im not going to binge anymore
im not going to purge anymore. it hurts too much.
i look like crap.
my face seems fucked up and blotchy.
it hurts.
im not going to blog until in i'm the 40s again.
i want to be skinny.
i take up so much space.
its a wonder i even have a boyfriend.
how could he not be replused by this fat lard?
i dont understand at all.

take care x